June 29, 2009
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My Celebration of Ramadan
I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it. (George Bernard Shaw)
Date 6/22/09
To:
Re: My Experience During Ramadan
About four or five years ago I decided to do something different. Ever since 9/11 I have felt that the Muslims in our society were a maligned minority and have wished I could help in my own way. When the month of Ramadan came around I thought I might have such an opportunity. Although I don’t know much about their faith and traditions, I do know that during this month of fasting, they will break fast in the evening after sundown. I also knew that often they would celebrate their breaking of fast with others – even of a non-Muslim faith. I decided that I would like to break fast with a family during this month. However I then realized how stratified my friendships were as I didn’t know any practicing Muslims. I’m sure some of my friends may have been Muslims, but not overtly practicing where I could ask them if I could join them.
So I went to the Unitarian Universalist (UU) minister in town and asked her if she knew of any Muslim families who would appreciate the opportunity of having a “stranger in their midst” for the breaking of their fast. She did some investigating and found out that there was a community of Muslims which broke fast at a UU church in a nearby town. They actually had a worship service there before the breaking of the fast. She had contacted them and they agreed to let me come and be an observer to the service and then to join them in their meal.
Knowing nothing of this group, I was expecting it to be a diverse group of Muslims in the MetroWest part of Boston from many countries – kind of a Diaspora of Muslims. I wasn’t expecting what I found. When I got there, the entire group of about 50 was from India – the Northern part of India, of course. So I observed the entire ceremony in a foreign language that I couldn’t even identify. I’m not sure if it was an Indian language or possibly even Urdu. But I sat on the sidelines and observed while the men and boys were up front and the women and girls were in the back of the room. (Of course, they were all seated on the floor.) It was fascinating to watch and I came away with two words: respect, and reverence. I was amazed at the respect I saw displayed – especially with the children to their elders. And I was also impressed with the level of reverence which was displayed during the service whether it was during their prayers or listening to the readings, or listening to the leader (perhaps an Imam?). It was an experience that although it made me feel exhilarated, it also made me feel disappointed in that I would have loved to have shared this experience with so many of my friends. But I knew that would not happen.
Then we had a delicious meal and I joined them in sitting on the floor and talking to several of the fathers and even the boys. It was a great community experience and I have cherished the opportunity that was given me by this group on that evening. That’s when I learned that these people were from Northern India and were in the process of having a beautiful mosque built nearby and were using this church temporarily until the mosque was finished.
This experience and these discussions also taught me of the hardships that occur when entire communities are divided by imposed, often arbitrary national boundaries – such as the separation of the Muslims in Northern India from the Muslims in Pakistan as a consequence of the country borders in 1947 (or 1948?). When there is enmity between the groups on either side of the boundary and causing subsequent abuse to the minorities by the majorities in each country, people are separated from religious communities, friends, and even families. A truth which I still feel when I consider what has been done in Palestine – especially with the building of the Israeli Wall which separates established communities and even families to say nothing about workers from their livelihoods.
This experience, by the way, was part of my goal to learn empathy. (I define empathy as really understanding what and why a person thinks and feels the way(s) that they do.)
David
